A couple days ago we wrapped up work on MAD Dinner, the book I’ve been making for the past couple months.

As in any publishing project, the end of MAD Dinner production involved a lot of long nights. I’ve had this experience a lot of times and it’s disturbingly similar every time. So I thought why not make a little diary of how it went this time. Then I realized that would be pretty boring, so I decided to set it to music. The result is below - Pain Release 2007 - an all-nighter in mixtape form….

Below is a tracklist and hour-by-hour account of the last night of design. Each song sets the tone for my emotional state….

18:00 Shaun Escoffery - Let it go (Jazzanova remix)
State: Unrealistic Optimism

I arrive around 6 knowing it will be a long night of labor and misunderstandings. As I enter the graphic designers’ studio I give myself a silent pep talk. No matter how dysfunctional things become, I say to self, I must, like the man Shaun Escoffery says, “Let it go.”

19:00 Da Lata - Ronco da cuica
State: Productive hubris

Before I can start editing the texts, a lengthy negotiation takes place. The designer insists that he make all the changes, knowing full well that we can barely communicate. I explain that I can easily make the changes myself, thereby saving us both lots of time and frustration. “This will be the easiest night of work you’ve ever had!” I say good naturedly and then demand that my words be translated. He kind of smiles awkwardly and counters with a series of new concerns. Had I ever used Indesign before? Yes, well this is a Chinese version. You can figure it out? This is a mac, have you used a mac?… Eventually he went to use the toilet, which I took for a sign of surrender. I celebrate by working hard and foolishly predicting that I’ll be able to go home “a lot sooner than I thought…”

20:00 MIA - 20 dollar
State: Unproductive irritability

After an hour or so of work, one of the designers’ girlfriends arrives with a kitten. This is taken by all (apart from me, the animal-hating anti-social foreigner) as a cue to stop all work and bullshit for the next hour. I continue, but feel weirdly hostile.

21:00 Crime Mobb - Knuck if you buck (instrumental)
State: Bummed-out incomprehension

As the kitty-inspired break stretches on past an hour, I become slightly despondent. The scene takes on surreal qualities as I watch men who have tons and tons of work to do - as they so often point out when I suggest making changes - flipping through magazines and reminiscing over cell phone photos. I feel strongly inclined to get my workaholic parent on and go tell the kids to break it up, but remind myself of my commitment to “let it go”.

22:00 Damian Marley w/ Stephen Marley, Capleton, Drag-on - It was written
State: Half sad, half soothed

The designers have come back to work now. I know that the last hour of free time will have to be made up, most likely in the early hours of tomorrow, and I’ll probably have to stick around for that. But at least we’re making progress. Who knows?

23:00 Dennis Brown - Slave driver
State: Perseverance in the face of tedium

The day before it was explained to me that, when romanizing Chinese characters, it makes more sense to break up words by their characters. For Chinese readers, it seems unnatural to for instance write Mao Zedong, since it’s 3 characters. Mao Ze Dong or Mao ZeDong makes more sense. The logic seems good to me, and I noticed that, especially for longer, less familiar Chinese words, breaking it up phonetically makes them less intimidating to read. So I figured why not, and decided to handle all of the romanized Chinese words in this way. So I set about going through all the texts in the book and changing them according to this system.

24:00 Rankin Joe - Slave driver dub
State: Depressed deja vu

While making changes to an interview with a city official who repeatedly mentions Beijing and Shanghai, I realize that if I follow the new system and change the words to BeiJing or Shang Hai, they look totally ridiculous. In great pain, I abandon the grand punctuation experiment and go back to the typical, less readable way. The next hour is spent retracing my steps and painstakingly re-changing all the changes that I’d spent the hour before making. The most painful part is I have no one to blame for this enormous waste of time.

1:00 Eek-a-mouse - Long time ago
State: Caffeine & sugar serenity

Around one everyone agrees that they’re hungry and someone offers to go to McDonald’s. I ask for a cheeseburger. It arrives with a coke. I never drink coke. In high school I worked at a burger king and part of my job was to replace the bags of black syrup that fast food restaurants dilute and serve to the customers as coke. Since then I just don’t fuck with it. But everyone has a drink, and it seems rude to reject it. So I drink about half. The impact is immediate and pleasurable. I suddenly feel more positive, more hopeful, invigorated and affectionate. I start making random small talk with no one in particular. One of the designers suggests we fire up the Wii to work off some of these calories. I’m absolutely psyched by this idea and spend most the next hour losing at tennis.

2:00 Kool and the Gang - Summer madness
State: Sweaty disorientation

After all that passionate Wiing, I’m sweaty and a little light headed. I know I have to get back to work, but can’t concentrate. Some of the caffeine-fueled tranquility remains, but I can see a comedown on the horizon. I finish the coke.

3:00 Handsome Boy Modeling School w/ Cat Power - I’ve been thinking
State: Exhaustion

I finally get back to work. I feel very tired, particularly when I think of how much more has to be done and how little coke remains.

4:00 John Mayer - I don’t trust myself (with loving you)
State: Floating

I finally finish the section I’m working on. Before I can start the next one, I need to wait for the designer to finish the layout. This takes about on hour. During this time I’m mostly resting on a bean bag chair. Big shout out to bean bag chairs.

5:00 Anthony Hamilton - Do you feel me?
State: Inexplicable emotionalism

As dawn approaches I am overcome with feelings of sadness, affection, nostalgia, and fatigated euphoria. A few times while I’m making sure the punctuation is consistent and there aren’t any widow or orphan lines, I feel like I might start crying.

6:00 Platinum Pied Pipers - The light
State: Redemption

The sun rises, and I start to think about this night actually being over. There’s not that much more work for me to do. Barring some sort of catastrophe, we should be coming to the end. I feel stronger for having made it through the night. I feel something like what Gandalf must have felt after surviving his bout with the Balrog of Moria.

7:00 Common - I want you
State: Satisfaction and longing

I’ve finished my stuff and feel pretty good, but I need to wait around for a few things to be finished before everything can be signed off and sent for a test print. I ask if they have a dancing game for the Wii. They do not.

8:00 Spank Rock - Chilly Will
State: High on life, low on patience

Been waiting around for over an hour, so I start to pressure the designers. They don’t appreciate this, understandably. I’m just trying to get out of here. Just show me the stuff I need to check and I am out of here. You can color correct all you want once I’m gone.

9:00 Club Kings - Boy don’t waste my time
State: Forced finesse

I am doing my best to stay cool, but inside I feel like I’m going mad. I feel like a hostage. Nevertheless, I maintain a kind of chummy, sympathetic demeanor when asking (for the 50th time), when I’ll be able to finish up and move on.

10:00 Club Kings - Wanna fuck you
State: Angry happiness

When the time finally comes, the designer acts like he’s going me a favor. “I’ve still got so much to do,” he says, while getting up out of the seat that I’ve been hovering around for 2 hours plus. I am so happy and tired that my hands are twitching while I give everything a final check. These are moments when you have to somehow find a way to maintain your discipline and be thorough even though you’re tired and want nothing more than to get the fuck out. I still haven’t managed to find a way to do that though, so I just kind of quickly read through, hit apple+S and I’m out!!

11:00 Rod Lee - Dance my pain away
State: Post-traumatic, pre-grimey

I leave the office to the hustle and bustle of Beijing’s CBD. It is impossibly bright. I briefly consider getting a massage, but I’m sure I’ll fall asleep. I put on my ipod and head home, looking forward to the drunken dance floor action awaiting me that evening.

The End

Anyway, in a moment of sleep-deprived, thank-you-jesus-it’s-over euphoria, I blended it all together into a single mix. I think this captures the ebb and flow of sanity better… Please listen and let me know what you think.

You can download it HERE. Just right-click/ctrl-click the link and choose “save target as” (windows) or “save link as” (mac).

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